Open Letter to the “Macho” Men of Rio de Janeiro

I was in the hospital, and after that, in bed for days.

My first walk outside my apartment in almost a week was greeted by soft wind, a bright sun, and pleasant temperatures. It felt like heaven.

Rio de Janeiro Leme Beach

Until my peace was interrupted by YOU. A leering, shouting from the other side of the sidewalk, CREEP old enough to be my grandpa. And YOU, teenage boy who should be in school right now, but who instead is smacking and sucking his lips at me. And YOU, delivery guy who brought his bike close enough to almost run over my dog for the purpose of spitting some unintelligibly ugly words my way.

3 catcalls/harassments/comments (what do you call these?) in about 5 minutes – welcome back to the real world of Rio de Janeiro.

I am sick of you.

Yes, you – with your rude gestures, your obscene comments, and your grabbing hands.

Whether on the way home from a class, leaving the grocery store, or heading to work – your disrespect is constant and inescapable.

It doesn’t matter what clothes I wear, or if I stop putting on makeup, or if I actually attempt to look as unappealing as physically possible. And I’m not alone.

Please, if not for the sake of respect for women (which is apparently an alien concept to you), then reign yourself in for your own self respect and efficacy. YOUR WAYS DON’T WORK.

I’ve talked to foreign girls, Carioca girls, girls visiting from other parts of Brazil.

The least pleasant part of this city?

YOU.

Yes, you may be physically beautiful and possibly even smart and charming, once you open your mouth up long enough to form something other than a sucking noise or a guttural moan – but who would know?

Your actions are ugly and they cover up any potentially positive traits.

Likely, you learned this behavior from your father, and he from his, judging from the number of men my father and grandfather’s age that have propositioned me.

Make this end with you. Think of your own sister, your mother, your future daughter – take a minute to think of someone OTHER than yourself. Imagine how uncomfortable and impossible it is to walk on the streets unescorted – not because this is Saudi Arabia and law demands it but because of men like YOU.

If that does nothing for your sense of decency, at least consider your own benefit. The Olympics are fast approaching, and the city will soon flood with thousands of visiting women from every part of the globe. Revise your M.O. Use the confidence that obviously isn’t in short supply and strike up a conversation. Maybe you’ll strike out. But maybe you won’t.

No matter the outcome, at least the visiting girls will go home with something better to share than “Rio was beautiful… but the guys are total creeps.”

Rio de Janeiro Beach Leblon

*Please note, this letter does not apply to all men in Rio. I have several amazing, exemplary male friends who I am proud to know, and I am sure there are many more. Sadly, the most vocal and visible part of the men in Rio belong to the group I’m speaking to above.*

Necessary Details: Rio de Janeiro

What Else to Do in Rio de Janeiro
Check out my full guide to Rio de Janeiro here, which includes the best suggestions for hiking (including my favorite Morro do Leme hike), where to eat, weekend getaways from the city (including Buzios), and the best beaches.
You can read every article I’ve ever written about Rio de Janeiro (and there’s a lot: I lived there for almost two years!) here.
Viator offers a bunch of different Rio de Janeiro tour options, including for visiting Christ the Redeemer, and provides excellent customer service and refunds if anything goes wrong — much more than local operators would do.
Where to Stay in Rio de Janeiro
If you have around $100 per night to spend, you can’t get a better value than Rio 180 hotel — each room is a suite and has its own private hot tub along with incredible views!
For a wider range of pricing options, check here
How to Arrive to Rio de Janeiro 
You can take the bus into Rio de Janeiro from many destinations within Brazil, but most people choose to fly. While Copa Airlines isn’t my favorite carrier, they do usually offer the cheapest flights. To check the latest low prices on airfare to Brazil, try Skyscanner , or if you have some date and/or destination flexibility and want to score the absolute lowest prices, try Kiwi.com.
Visa information for Brazil and Visa Renewal in Rio de Janeiro
I’ve written an extensive post (along with Q&A about the topic in the comments) here
Follow:
Steph

A short vacation in Thailand turned into a life abroad with a canceled ticket home. Nearly a decade later and after living in Bangkok, Rio de Janeiro, Puebla, and Puerto Vallarta, Steph is on to her next adventure and living back in beautiful, cosmopolitan Mexico City. She is living, traveling, and working (both as an expat therapist and an international health insurance representative) around the world to find the beautiful, inspirational, and interesting while sharing it with you!

Find me on: Web | Instagram | Facebook

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.