While you heard from Roxanne a few weeks ago (here), today she’ll be sharing her Quarter Life Epiphany story in-depth.
Roxanne’s Quarter Life Epiphany
I was 24 and a half years old: I woke up one morning with a strange feeling and no motivation to go to my classes. It was not because I didn’t like school, or because I didn’t enjoy what I was studying. It’s just that all of this was not the life I wanted for myself. It didn’t feel right anymore. I thought to myself: “I’m a dreamer, I’m restless – this is wrong”. I can’t stay in one place for long periods of time and work a steady office job with no prospects of escape. For me, I needed more.
A few months later, there I was, all alone in the middle of Mumbai. Around me, everything was crazy. There was so much happening, but somehow, I felt much calmer than I was on that morning before school. It felt right. It was not the first time I had been travelling, but this time, I felt more than just happy to be traveling. I felt like I had made the right choice, and that I needed to continue traveling for a while. My quarter life epiphany.
After I quit my master’s degree I worked full time to save money for my trip to India. I had even moved back to my parents’ place to avoid expenses. During this time I had full on quarter life crisis. It was so hard to even be in my head: “Where I am going? What am I doing with my life? Was all of this a waste of time? What do I enjoy doing?” I swear, I almost didn’t know who I was anymore.
I arrived in India, and then, this feeling started to fade. Not right away, but gradually. Being on the road again immediately felt good, but one month into my travel, I still found myself crying after finishing The Alchemist because I didn’t know what my “personal legend” was. At times I had doubts, but I never looked back.
And then, the bad feelings faded away completely. Slowly I stopped asking questions. I accepted that I don’t know what I was doing, and that I don’t know what I would be doing. I forgave myself for that. I decided I would be doing what felt right for me, and that at this point in my life, traveling feels oh-so-damn right. It all happened in my head without me realizing it. I now felt confident about my choice of quitting school. I started reading inspiring books, thought about starting a travel blog (insert link to en.lavieenrox.com) and continued fantasizing about various destinations. I’m a dreamer, I’m restless. So, yes; traveling feels right to me.
I still don’t know where I am going and what I am doing. Maybe no one really knows? I’m just doing what I love and accumulating experiences. I think that life is a series of experiences and that somehow, these experiences lead us to where we belong and where we feel truly happy. I read in one of those inspiring books –Steve Jobs’ biography- a sentence that I always keep in my mind for when I need it: “You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.” You’re so clever Steve. I’ll keep making dots along the way, lots of them, and big, bold and colorful ones, and I can only hope that they connect in the loveliest drawing I could ever imagine.
To learn more about Roxanne and keep up on her travels
I’m Roxanne, author of the blog La Vie en Rox. This is my little oasis where I can talk about all things travel and dream of going even further! Come dream with me!
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